Fire play made me squirt. Yep, you read that correctly. Now, before you start panicking and thinking kink is full of extremes and isn’t for you, let me explain.
For me, BDSM was never about chasing the next adrenaline rush or seeing how much I could handle before I cracked. It was about trust, communication, and discovering what I enjoyed and how my body responded—before anyone else, especially a man, could tell me what I did or did not like. I wanted to learn who I could be and how I would show up intimately with someone I trusted enough to fully surrender to—not because I was performing, but because I genuinely trusted them.
Before discovering that I could squirt—let alone that fire play could get me there—I had already dipped my toe into a few things. I had tried wax play mixed with a little knife play. I had even had a few tassels from my favorite flogger broken off on me—but we’re going to have to dive into that story later.
By the time I finally booked a session with the Dapper Dom—that’s what I called him in my head—known as Sir Marvelous, I felt like I was big girl enough not to chicken out.
I’m not going to spill ALL the beans because I don’t think my words could fully do his services justice. During our session, Sir allowed me to experience every tool I thought I was afraid of without pressuring me to cross my boundaries. He showed me that some things that look intimidating can feel completely different from what we imagine—and sometimes, that intimidating appearance is part of the appeal.
He even demonstrated how fire play can feel similar to a hot stone massage. But like any form of kink play—especially one involving fire—it carries real risks. Don’t attempt it without proper training, education, consent, and safety precautions.
My session with Sir Marvelous taught me that pleasure can come from more than traditional sex or your typical toys. Kink doesn’t have to begin with fire, knives, or anything else that looks extreme. You can start small—a smack on the ass, a little hair-pulling, or adding a toy during sex—and explore from there with communication and consent.
You may discover something new about your body. You might even have a stronger orgasm.
You never know.
1 comment
I really agree with this. I think people hear “kink” and immediately associate it with the most extreme version of it, when it can really just be about exploring what excites you outside of what you’ve always considered “normal.” Sometimes it’s dirty talk, a certain kind of physical touch, power dynamics, being more vocal about what you want, or simply trying something that challenges your usual boundaries in a safe and consensual way. It doesn’t have to be extreme to be kinky or enjoyable. Sometimes the fun is just discovering something you didn’t know turned you